It was my very first time doing any sort of audition. I didn’t want to do district, a solo, or anything like that. I caved and decided to audition for the TMEA All-State Choir in 8th grade. I didn’t care if I made it because there were only 250 spots and over 15,000 auditioners and there’s no way my first successful audition would be a state one. The results were said to be out by a specific date in May that I don’t remember. I waited weeks and finally, the day had come.

   I remember waking up slightly eager to see the results because I kind of wanted to make it. My hopes were still low so I wouldn't be upset if I didn’t make it. I asked my mom if there had been any results but all she said was “No I’m sorry”. “Eh whatever, it’s not a big deal, I don’t really care,” I said . So I went ahead and went to school like any other day. Even though I didn’t think I would make it I kept periodically checking in with my mom and refreshing my email.

I was in the middle of 4th period when suddenly the wifi went out, so I turned on my hotspot. Nothing. I couldn’t access anything on my Chromebook. So I texted my mom and asked her if she had heard anything. “ERROR”. My messages weren’t going through on my phone either! I started to worry if I would ever see the results but wait…I don’t care, right? So I put the disappointment behind me and kept on with my day.

    What feels like hours go by until I finally get to my 5th period; choir. I walk in trying not to ask or think about the results. We sing and sight-read like any other day with no mention of the TMEA results. The end of the class finally comes and I start getting disappointed agai- “Kali can you come here please?”. I rush towards my teacher excited to hear what she has to say. She looks at me with sorrowful eyes and starts to say “I’m sorry..”. “I didn’t make it did I?” I think to myself.