Chapter 1: The Fish Who Wasn't Normal
April 1st
Okay, first of all, let’s get something straight: I am NOT your average fish. I mean, just look at me. My name is Finn, and I’m a goldfish—well, was a goldfish—until something… strange happened. I never asked for this, but now I can do things that no other fish can do. I can talk for one thing, which is very handy since I now live with two kids who don’t seem to get me at all. I never asked for this, but now I can do things that no other fish can do. I can talk for one thing, which is very handy since I now live with two kids who don’t seem to get me at all ..

Instead, it made me BIG. I mean, I’m talking huge, as in, I-can-now-eat-all-the-flake-food-I-want-in-one-swoop huge. And I’m glowing. Not in the “I’m just a shiny fish” way. I mean, seriously glowing like I’m a radioactive fish out of a science fiction movie.

It’s… weird. Really weird. But here’s the thing: Now that I’m bigger, I can do other stuff too. For instance, today I ate an entire jar of fish food in one sitting and didn't feel a single ounce of guilt. It’s awesome.

Chapter 2: The Awful Experiment
April 3rd
Today Tom tried to turn me into a genius by putting me in a “brain-boosting” machine he built in his bedroom. Don’t ask. I have no idea how the kid got so obsessed with making me a “scientifically enhanced super-fish,” but he does this thing where he gets an idea in his head and doesn’t let it go.

Anyway, the machine? Yeah. Not so much.

It made the water in my tank bubble and glow. Then there were some sparks. Then there was an explosion. And then I suddenly gained the ability to speak.

Yup. I can talk. Like a human. Or at least, that's what it

sounds like. Tom dropped his entire science book on the floor when I told him I was hungry for more food. Apparently, humans don’t realize that fish can be sarcastic. Well, I’m about to teach him otherwise. 

Anyway, Tom thought he had it all figured out. He put me in this tank—now with extra wires and blinking lights—and hit a big red button. I knew something was up when the tank started to buzz, and I felt this weird tingling sensation, like my whole body was covered in static electricity.

At first, I thought maybe he was just testing the waters (literally), but then... the machine started making this high-pitched whine. It sounded like a dog whistle crossed with an electric razor.

Then, bam!

The tank started to glow. The water was flashing neon blue, and the bubbles looked like little sparkles. I was like, “Okay, that’s pretty cool. Maybe this won’t be so bad.”

But it was bad.

The next thing I knew, the water was swirling around me faster than a whirlpool. I tried to swim out, but the current was so strong that I ended up tumbling around like a sock in a dryer. And just when I thought I was going to pass out from spinning, there was a flash of light—so bright I had to close my eyes—and then... nothing.

When I opened them, I wasn’t just any regular fish.

I was glowing.

Not in a subtle way, either. I mean, seriously, I was glowing. Like, “I might as well be a lighthouse” glowing. My fins lit up like they were made of neon, and when I looked in the mirror (yes, there’s a tiny fish mirror in Tom’s tank—don’t judge), I swear I saw little sparkles coming off my scales. I mean, I could practically see my own reflection from across the room.

Tom’s jaw dropped. “Finn... You... you’re glowing!”

I wasn’t sure whether to be impressed or terrified, but then I realized—something else was different too. I could hear my own voice.

Chapter 3: Operation Fish-Tastrophe
April 5th
Tom’s sister, Lily, heard me talking today and freaked out. She tried to “hide” me in the closet so Mom wouldn’t find out that her pet goldfish had gained the ability to speak and glow like a freaky lab experiment gone wrong.

Let me tell you something: hiding a giant, glowing, talking fish in a closet is NOT a good idea. I’m pretty sure I knocked over at least three of Lily’s favorite books and accidentally knocked over her cereal box. But who could blame me? I’m a fish with no hands.

The problem is that Tom has now decided he’s going to make me famous. He wants to show me off at school and

maybe even film me for his science project. But I’m not about to be some circus attraction. I’ve got a reputation to uphold.

We need a plan. A great plan.

Chapter 4: The Escaped Experiment
April 7th
Okay, things just got out of hand.

Lily and Tom’s mom went out, so they thought it would be the perfect time for them to test out Tom’s “Fish-Tastic Tank of Science” (don’t ask, I didn’t name it). He wanted to see if I could, like, do tricks or something. It was a stupid idea. But I wasn’t about to let him off the hook for it.

I escaped the tank. Well, sort of.

Tom wasn’t ready for a fish on the loose. I mean, can you blame him? Who would expect a giant, glowing, talking fish to suddenly jump out of a tank and start swimming